First Friday 5 x 5 x 5 performance art variety night: five artists, five performances, five (ish) minutes each. I'll be sharing a song or few. At the Art City Gallery. Free.
Lyrics from the album The Love Still Shows, release date: February 10, 2017
Break Free
©℗2016 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
Cross my arms, stamp my feet
Day and night I clench my teeth
Shoulders tight, can barely breathe
There is a song inside of me longing to break free
(chorus)
Break free, break free, break free, break free
There is a song inside of me longing to break free
A throat that burns with grief so deep
The weight of all I dare not speak
Strangles vital energy
There is a song inside of me longing to break free
(repeat chorus)
Don't know how else I could be
Tempted to admit defeat
The heart waits so patiently
There is a song inside of me longing to break free
Claim holy ground beneath my feet
Arms uplifting toward release
I dare to sing imperfectly
There is a song inside of me longing to break free
Break free, break free, break free, break free
There is a song inside of me
Break free, break free, break free, break free
There is a song inside of me
Break free, break free, break free, break free
There is a song inside of me
Breaking free
It Ain't Personal
©℗2016 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
Moving up to the head of the class
Missed lessons I could not pass
Started in the lead just to come in last
You will wait for me, not too late for me
Only not so fast
(chorus)
It ain't personal, it ain't personal at all
I tried to walk before I could crawl
It ain't personal, it ain't personal at all
Fall from grace, grace gonna break my fall
Skip steps, jump through hoops
Teacher's pet forgot the golden rule
Thought I knew it all when I didn't have a clue
Can't go over it, can't go under it
Gonna make it through
(repeat chorus)
Fall from grace, grace gonna break my fall
Here it comes, another chance
Gotta learn how to walk so I can dance
Gotta take a step back if I want to advance
(chorus)
Fall from grace, grace gonna break my fall
Fall from grace, grace gonna break my fall
Look At Me
©℗2016 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
I confess I dress to impress you
Every day I cast a spell
Paint my face and don a costume
To be the one you'll love so well
(chorus)
Look at me, but not so closely now
Look at me, but not so close
Look at me, but not so closely now
Look at me, not so close
Tailor made to fit and to flatter
Accentuate, slim, trim, and hide
Designs to attract and distract you
Looking slick but sick inside
(repeat chorus)
Dressed to kill a secret sorrow
Dressed to fill an empty ache
Dressed to win your approval
And still I never felt okay
I'm sorry for the ways I used you
I'm sorry for the times I lied
I'm sorry for my confusion
Begging for what you can't provide
Today I dress to please myself
A grey-green hat to match my eyes
Patchwork kaleidoscopic color
I feel at ease, shed my disguise
I feel at ease, shed my disguise
Look at me, closer now
Look at me, come close
Look at me, come closer now
Look at me and let me see
Beauty Queen
©℗2015 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
You were raised by strong, smart women
Who were agonized by the size of their thighs
Who cursed dark circles under their eyes
And any mark upon their skin
They reminisce about when they were thin
Then you grew up to look just like them
You were teased and tried to be tough
When you were just a geeky teen
Reading grocery check stand magazines
Lose more weight to be enough
Look like a model to win their love
You never thought you measured up
(chorus)
Well, I declare, you're complete
With flaws that make you dear to me
Darlin', you're my beauty queen
Darlin', you're my beauty queen
Misprints make the most valuable stamps
Losing our balance is just part of the dance
(repeat chorus)
Angel Of A Cat
©℗2016 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
I hadn't lived here long when I first saw you nearby
You seemed so uncertain, kept your distance, acted shy
You didn't run away, though, I could see your shining eyes
I didn't know back then how much you'd brighten up my life
(chorus)
Just a neighborhood kitty come from over the wall
Don't know where you go or where you stay
But every day you visit, cheer me up, and make me laugh
You are an angel of a cat
When I sit down to dinner then you're at the window
Peeping through the curtains, spotty paw and two-tone nose
You tilt your head and watch me like I'm your private show
Till I come out and pet you, sweetest cat I've ever known
(repeat chorus)
You sneak in through the back door against the landlord rules
I bribe you out with treats, and you mew your tiny mew
Glowy-eyed fur cloud 'neath the light of a super moon
Brand new terms of endearment made for you
(repeat chorus)
You are an angel of a cat
The Love Still Shows
©℗2016 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
Red geraniums planted with care
Crooked bangs since mom cut our hair
Pink-trimmed dress all washed up and pressed
Unaware just how much I was blessed
No one meant to be cruel
They sent their baby off to school
Photos taken so long ago
My folks are gone, the love still shows
My folks are gone, the love still grows
A stranger's smile eased my despair
The friend who called out of nowhere
My heart touched by a hopeful song
The way you held me until the dawn
Such little things have seen me through
Such little things can be so huge
More than we may ever know
The moments pass, the love still shows
The moments pass, the love still grows
Odds Are For Beating
©℗2016 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
I thought my parents' marriage passed its expiration date
As a kid I prayed they'd get divorced, end their icy stalemate
Mom ended up in a nursing home, dad spent every day by her side
Forgiveness of unfinished business, turned out love was still alive
She didn't die cured, but there was a whole lot of healing
Odds are for beating, odds are for beating
As long as we're still breathing there's a chance of change for the best
In ways we least expect, odds are for beating
Odds are for beating
Years later, my dad had cancer, back and forth to the ICU
Through surgery, chemotherapy, close calls, and a feeding tube
Surprised each time he went back home, even able to go on his walks
Through pain he kept on smiling, he knew about beating odds
He didn't die cured, but there was a whole lot of healing
Odds are for beating, odds are for beating
As long as we're still breathing, there's a chance of change for the best
In ways we least expect, odds are for beating
Odds are for beating
My Blessed Child
©℗2016 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
Oh my child, my blessed child
Before you leave please stay a while
Ease your breaking heart a while
Stay a while, oh stay a while
Oh my child, my blessed child
Before you leave please stay a while
Ease your breaking heart a while
I am reaching out to you
The Book
©℗2016 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
You gave me a book, an indefinite loan
Bound in red cloth, letters written in gold
If anyone asks, "my, what is this?"
"Nothing at all," I could falsely dismiss
Denying how much you mean to me
Laughing it off as make believe
Though it leads me to doubt all of our vows
Love that tempts what Love will not allow
Love that tempts what Love will not allow
Brought down from the shelf when there's no one around
Afraid to admit what it is I have found
Turning the pages, how lonely the night
Warm in the glow of the bedside light
Its weight reassuring against my breast
Held close to my heart, every word that you blessed
If only it eased the sorrow somehow
Love that tempts what Love will not allow
Love that tempts what Love will not allow
The day may come when you need the book back
It never was yours to give me, in fact
And we could just act like it's not a big deal
Feelings still kept to ourselves left to heal
It's nothing more than a worn out old book
Just a fleeting touch, a lingering look
There's nothing more to do about it now
Love that tempts what Love will not allow
There's nothing more to do about it now
Love that tempts what Love will not allow
I Am Willing
©℗2016 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
Oh, honey, I had no idea
I speak of peace, but it's not real
Spent all day on the edge of tears
Resisting what I think and feel
Taking stock of all these weapons
Forged in the name of self-protection
The rust-red stain through generations
My heart as scarred as warring nations
(chorus)
The very ways that saw me through
They're hurting me, they're killing you
And I'm not sure what I need to do
But I am willing to, I am willing
Is it a start to be aware?
When waves of pain come layer on layer?
I call on forces even greater
Hear our prayer, oh, hear our prayer
(repeat chorus)
I am willing, I am willing
Down By The Riverside
Traditional/Public Domain, Arrangement ©℗2016 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
Gonna lay down my sword and shield
Down by the riverside
Down by the riverside, down by the riverside
Gonna lay down my sword and shield
Down by the riverside
Ain't gonna study war no more
I ain't gonna study war no more, ain't gonna study war no more
Ain't gonna study war no more
I ain't gonna study war no more, ain't gonna study war no more
Ain't gonna study war no more
The Time Is Here
©℗2016 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
(chorus)
The time is here, my dearest dear
The time has come for us to part
Another season is complete
It's written on our hearts
This day had felt so far away
What seemed unreal is coming true
The love we share will still remain
Just as it goes with you
(chorus)
We're better for the time we shared
Singing loud and laughing longer
We were strong when we first met
And now we're even stronger
(chorus)
I've suffered needless misery
Wanting life to stay the same
Let us bless what came before
We're rolling with the change
You know we see what we believe
Clear fear by leaps of faith
We're given more by giving more
Receiving grace with grace
(chorus)
Go and make another start
Go and make another start
Lyrics from the album Nameless Heart, released April 1, 2014
Time Of Delight
©℗2014 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
Take off your watch, hide all the clocks
Today we’ll tell time by the sun and the sky
Rest your head a while, close your eyes
May now be the time of delight
(chorus)
May now be the time, now be the time
May now be the time of delight
May now be the time, now be the time
May now be the time of delight
We’ll light the candles, bless the bread
Pour the wine, take a breath
So tired of striving, so grateful for life
May now be the time of delight
(repeat chorus)
May our vision be renewed,all that lies fallow it will surely bloom
Today there’s nothing we need to do but be and receive
(repeat chorus)
We’ll be marching, marching in the morning
Lay that aside tonight
Refill your cup, feel the warmth of our love
May now be the time of delight
(repeat chorus)
Refill your cup, feel the warmth of our love
May now be the time of delight
The Good News
©℗2014 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
I been told we have souls of gold
Why do we give it away?
I been told we have souls of gold
How I ache, how I ache
(chorus)
Pannin' for gold in muddy water
Good news is there's gold in the mud
Oh, my heart, I'm tired of muddy water
Good news is there's gold in the mud
Oh, my love, you shine like gold
Glimmer of sun on a stormy day
Oh, my love, you shine like gold
But treat yourself like an ashtray
(repeat chorus)
Here I am on this golden globe
Don't have long to stay
Here I am on this golden globe
Help me live what I pray
(repeat chorus twice)
Good news is there's gold in the mud
Good news is there's gold in the mud
Slot Machine
©℗2014 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
Smoke in my eyes, candlelight dim
You show up, never thought I’d see you again, oh no
You take all my money, I give all I have to give
Just when I’m ready to give up that’s when I win big, oh
(chorus)
Slot machine, losing odds and flashing lights
Slot machine, losing odds and flashing lights
I gamble while you ramble
Maybe today you’ll treat me right
Can’t stop playing, can’t let go
One stroke of luck, can melt months of ice & snow, oh
One warm smile, I shed my winter coat
One hot night, then the cold winds blow and blow and blow and blow, oh
(repeat chorus)
Look who’s standing by my side
The one who stood me up so many times
Hey, baby, where you been all night?
You ain’t nice but name the price
You say I love you, I want you, won’t you just go away?
How come I let you have it both ways?
(repeat chorus)
Smoke in my eyes, candlelight dim
You show up, never thought I’d see you again, oh
Flower Print Dress
©℗2014 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
(chorus)
Faded flower print dress, how it sway when she move
Faded flower print dress, how it sway when she move
Tunes drenched in rainwater, sweat, smoke, and booze
The hottest flames don’t burn red but blue blue blue
Think you know better but come up the fool
Ain’t that just what you always do?
(repeat chorus)
A banjo, a hammock, gardenia perfume
Her laugher even make the preacher man swoon
The only thing certain is you’re confused
You can’t tell a downfall from a muse
(repeat chorus)
June nights humid, magnolias in bloom
Removing the bandage hurt worse than the wound
You’ll trade comfort for a heart rent in two
You couldn’t help it if you wanted to
You couldn’t help it and you don’t want to
(repeat chorus)
Who Will Care?
©℗2014 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
I’m in pain and I got no way to pay
The welfare office turned us away
(chorus)
I’m so scared, who will care?
Who will care for you and me?
Anything is possible I do believe
Anything is possible I do believe
Diabetes since the age of fifteen
No insurance will cover me
(repeat chorus)
Been waiting and waiting
Just about to lose my patience
Praying, praying
Just about to lose my faith
Waiting, waiting
It’s all about to break open
Awaken, awaken
We can make a new day
Went to med school want to be a healer
Sometimes I feel like a wheeler and a dealer
(repeat chorus)
I’m dying of a treatable disease
Treatment it is a luxury
(repeat chorus)
I do believe, I do believe, I do believe
I do believe, I do believe, I do believe
(repeat chorus)
Anything is possible I do believe
Anything is possible I do believe
They Go On
©℗2014 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
They met when flowers were blooming
The trees were fragrant and green
That man who came courting in uniform
Was the handsomest she’d ever seen
(chorus)
They go on, they go on
Head held high, shoulders back, they go on
They go on, they go on, they go on and on
She’s home alone with the babies
He’s off at war far away
She thinks to herself how life doesn’t match
The romance of their first summer days
(repeat chorus)
The soldiers at the airport
Where they’re headed? Just couldn’t say
But everyone stops and stands if they can
To applaud as they pass on their way
(repeat chorus)
Strangers in stiff dress uniform
Express regret door to door
Your son or daughter, spouse or lover
Won’t be coming home anymore
Your father, mother, sister, brother
Won’t be coming home anymore
(repeat chorus)
We go on, we go on
Head held high, shoulders back, we go on,
We go on, we go on, we go on and on
Lost Before Found
©℗2014 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
Heard you singing through the window
Curtains billowed on the breeze
Met me in the blue of twilight
Down by the willow tree
Song, song, like an old friend
A melody, why did it end?
Song, song, like an old friend
Oh, how I wish I could hear it again
(chorus)
Lost before I ever found you
Twirling in circles around death the thief
Lost before I ever found you
Time cast a shadow between you and me
Hair in tangles past your shoulders
Cotton dress to the knee
We danced barefoot on the damp grass
Then you slipped away from me
Song, song, break my heart
Your voice defies death the thief
Song, song, break open my heart
Sure as you set me to dancing free
(repeat chorus)
Song, song, common as longing
A tune I wish could last and last
Song, song, common as longing
Sing me home to an August long past
(repeat chorus twice)
Time cast a shadow between you and me
Dragon Lady
©℗2014 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
Smoking on her porch in the dead of night
Shouts at those who dare pass by
It’s no use to try and hide
Posted: No Trespassing signs
The Dragon Lady
(chorus)
Tiptoe round, don’t you make a sound, don’t you make a sound now
Tiptoe round, don’t you make a sound, don’t you make a sound now
Tiptoe round, don’t you make a sound, don’t you make a sound now
Where the road dead ends we meet our friends
Sneaking to the lake for a midnight swim
Make it past her, dive on in
“Hope you drown!” she screams again
The Dragon Lady
(repeat chorus)
One night I had a crazy dream
Looked in the lake and what did I see?
The one I swore I’d never be
Life should turn out differently
The Dragon Lady
Those brats are screaming through the trees
They don’t know the grief I grieve
May they suffer just like me
Awake, forsaken, on my knees
The Dragon Lady
(repeat chorus)
Keep out! Watch out! The Dragon Lady
Nameless Heart
©℗2014 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
Deliver me from this treacherous land
This is not the journey I planned
Once there were signs showing the way
They’ve all faded and fallen away
(chorus)
Destroy me, blow it apart
Till nothing remains but this nameless heart
Destroy me, blow it apart
Till nothing remains but this nameless heart
Prove it that I matter to you
Settle for less to get me through
Seek the high avoid the low
Cover it up so the marks don’t show
(repeat chorus)
Restore me, make me feel clean
It costs so much getting touched for free
I want to be above reproach
Show me that you love me the most
(repeat chorus)
Till nothing remains
But this nameless heart
Good for What Ails Me
©℗2014 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
You could be good for what ails me
If you don’t fail me now
You could be so good for what ails me
I know you won’t fail me now
As you brush the hair back from my eyes
And we kiss hello and goodbye
Wind chimes and wooden steps
Leading to your room that overlooks the ocean
The fog is floating in tonight
As you show me to your room that overlooks the ocean
And you brush the hair back from my eyes
And we kiss hello and goodbye
You could be good for what ails me
If you don’t fail me now
You could be so good for what ails me
I know you won’t fail me
Turn down the lights now
We’ll lay down our plight for now
Brush the hair back from my eyes
And kiss hello and goodbye
Wind chimes and wooden steps
Leading from your room that overlooks the ocean
You have a flight to catch
Going home across another ocean
And you brush the hair back from my eyes
And we kiss goodbye
You could be good for what ails me, oh
You could be so good for what ails me, oh
I'm Not Going Anywhere
©℗2014 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
I just wanted to let you know
I can take it slow
So keep on make believing you’re not feeling what you’re feeling
You will till you won’t
But I’m not going anywhere
It’s alright if you are scared
Be who it is you think you need to be
You’re not fooling me
All you're hiding all you're seeking
All your silence revealing
You will till you won’t
But I’m not going anywhere
I just wanted to let you know
I can take it slow
So keep on make believing
You’re not feeling what you’re feeling
You will till you won’t
But I’m not going anywhere
It’s alright if you are scared
Of who it is you think you seem to be
You’re not fooling me
So pretend you’re some villain
Or some ideal vision
You will till you won’t
But I’m not going anywhere
I just wanted to let you know
I can take it slow
So keep on make believing
You’re not feeling what you’re feeling
You will till you won’t
But I’m not going anywhere
Worthy
©℗2014 Donna Lynn Caskey Cordulia Music BMI
I am a lonesome traveler
Needing a friend to talk to
You say come just as you are
You take my hands, warm my fingers
(chorus)
Worthy, you are worthy
Speak your truth, tell your story
Worthy, worthy
In all your shame, in all your glory
Whatever the skin you’re in
Sickly, healthy, thick or thin
Worthy, worthy
No matter how you’ve fallen short
How many times you’ve missed the mark
Worthy, worthy
Your heart about declared defeat
Stumbling through imperfectly
Worthy, worthy
(repeat chorus)
Oh, you weary traveler
You can rest the long, cold night here
Rain pouring on the roof
Wrap yourself in quilts and blankets
(repeat chorus)
Whatever secrets that you keep
However much we disagree
Worthy, worthy
Ghosts crowding ‘round your door
Full of regret or shown no remorse
Worthy, worthy
Barely standing, blood on your hands
Who could ever understand?
Worthy, worthy
Worthy, worthy
Speak your truth, tell your story
Worthy, worthy
Sometimes the pain outweighs the glory
All are welcome at the table, yes
Take your place beside the fire
Make the circle wider, brighter
Oh, you holy travelers
Grudges held and forgiven
Life, love, an offering
Join the song dance the rhythm
(repeat chorus)
All are welcome at the table, yes
Take your place beside the fire
Make the circle wider, brighter
Worthy, we are worthy
Speak your truth, tell your story
Everyone is worthy
In all our shame in all our glory
Upcoming Shows
Previous events
Steve Aguilar is carrying the torch of John M. White's First Friday 5 x 5 x 5 performance art variety nights- five artists, five performances, (approximately) five minutes each. I'll be sharing a song or few. At the Art City Gallery, a local treasure with an uncertain future. Come enjoy it while it lasts. Free.
The Dennis & Laura (& Donna Lynn) Show
NAMBA Performing Arts Space, 47 S. Oak St., Ventura, CA 93001
Dennis Russell and Laura Hemenway aka The Dennis & Laura Show invited me to play a set as part of their upcoming performance. They'll join me on some of my songs, and I'll join them on some of theirs. We hope you'll join us! Advance ticket purchase encouraged at https://www.nambaarts.com/the-dennis-and-laura-show/